Chris Voss On The Art Of Negotiation And Building Trust With People
Welcome to a very special episode!
It is special because… I originally lost it. No, I'm not joking…
Out of 200+ episodes, I have never lost a podcast episode, and yet this one I did. To make things even worse, the episode was amazing – in fact, I think it was our best episode recorded in 2018.
Anyway, the great news is our guest was so gracious that he was willing to rerecord it! And now, I hear you asking, who is this amazing guest?
Well, it is Chris Voss, the CEO of the Black Swan Group and author of the national best-seller “Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It“, which was named one of the seven best books on negotiation.
A 24-year veteran of the FBI, plus former member of a SWAT team, Chris retired as the lead international kidnapping negotiator, and then built his company helping businesses and individuals solve problems based on that exact experience and the accompanying skills.
Their negotiation methodology focuses on something different, which is discovering the “Black Swans,” small pieces of information that have a huge effect on an outcome. Chris and his team have helped companies secure and close better deals, save money, and solve internal communication problems.
Which is why you've probably seen Chris in TIME, Business Insider, Entrepreneur, Inc., Fast Company, Fortune, The Washington Post, CNN, ABC News and much more…
Chris Voss is the negotiation expert. And, if you're not in business and wondering what you're going to learn today that's valuable to you, it turns out that negotiation is a part of all of our lives, every single day, and we often don't even realize it.
The skills that Chris teaches to people are not only revolutionalizing their businesses, they're also revolutionalizing their relationships, their families, their personal lives, and much more.
In this episode, we go deep in various amazing topics, like:
- Human psychology
- How you can better build trust with people
- How you can deal with incredibly high-stress situations without freaking out
- Why you need to learn to handle stress to become more effective
- And, of course, how to better negotiate and have better outcomes both for you and for your partner
It's an incredible episode, which I think is almost as good, if not just as good as the first time we recorded it!
I'm certain you folks are going to enjoy this!
– Jonathan Levi
In this episode, we discuss:
- Who is Chris Voss, and what does he do? [7:10]
- What was Chris's journey that led to him becoming the lead international kidnapping negotiator? [7:50]
- How did Chris learn to thrive under pressure? [9:00]
- The transition from police SWAT officer to hostage negotiator [9:45]
- Does talent actually exist? [10:30]
- Why is negotiation a master skill? [11:15]
- How did Chris's book title come to be, and what does it mean to him? [13:50]
- Making the pie larger instead of just splitting it [16:00]
- How does Chris Voss handle stress and decision making under pressure? [17:50]
- The importance of being willing to take risks [19:20]
- How did Chris maintain top mental performance under prolonged stressful situations, like kidnapping negotiations? [21:40]
- How does Chris build trust with people so that they support his decisions? [23:40]
- What are some common pitfalls regarding negotiation? [25:55]
- What happens when things start going south? [28:10]
- An incredible story from Chris's career as a hostage negotiator [32:00]
- Picking up a few skills from negotiating tactics for ourselves [36:25]
- Some homework you can try out [39:40]
- A few words about Chris's book “Never Split The Difference” [42:30]
- Where can you learn more about Chris Voss? [44:45]
- Chris Voss's final takeaway message [46:00]
Resources Mentioned in This Episode:
- Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss
- The Talent Code: Greatness Isn't Born. It's Grown. Here's How by Daniel Coyle
- The Rise of Superman: Decoding the Science of Ultimate Human Performance by Steven Kotler
- Stealing Fire: How Silicon Valley, the Navy SEALs, and Maverick Scientists Are Revolutionizing the Way We Live and Work by Jamie Wheal and Steven Kotler
- Our previous episode with Steven Kotler
- The Happiness Advantage: Linking Positive Brains to Performance – TED talk by Shawn Achor
- Our previous episode with Andre Norman
- Text “FBIempathy” to 22828 to join Chris's newsletter and to find out how to reach him